Repair after a shaming comment

You said something sharp about their body, their effort, or their feelings, and you saw it land.

Try saying

“What I said earlier was a cheap shot.” A comment about their effort that stung
“That wasn't true and it wasn't fair.” A comment about their effort that stung
“I'm sorry. You didn't deserve that.” A comment about their effort that stung

For each age

Teen (13–18)

“I want to come back to what I said about your effort.”
“That was a cheap shot. I don't actually believe that.”
“You don't owe me anything for this. I just wanted to say it.”

Teens need the repair to come without strings. Demanding acknowledgement is its own injury.

School (5–12)

“What I said earlier, about your body. I take that back.”
“That wasn't true and it wasn't fair.”
“I'm sorry. You didn't deserve that.”

Naming the specific phrase makes the repair land. Vagueness reads as another dodge.